closeted with Barbie

I was just thinking about Barbie- the doll, when leaving a comment on afunt's post and I started to get a little carried away with my thoughts, so I thought I should bring it over to my place to elaborate. Kind of sad I think... a Barbie? What the fuck. But come on now, she’s a tall blond…mmmmm- Anyway, I remember my obsession with Barbie’s when I was a kid, but what I mostly remember is that cool camper she had. I loved that thing. Of course my older brother used to steal it from me or I’d find it tipped over in the corner of the living room with his G.I. Joe’s ambushing it. But even when Barbie was hung by her feet and attached to the chandelier in the dining room she still looked kinda hot.

I grew up in a pretty large home in the suburbs of Boston; I loved that house, cried when my parents sold it and still drive by it whenever I get back there. It’s in my dreams all the time. We had a pretty large front door which led into a decent size foyer, but it wasn’t too large at all- just right. If you took a couple of steps to the right you were in the living room and a couple of steps left brought you to the dining room. The highlight of that foyer was the closet. We used it as a coat closet, but it was also a good enough size for a 5 year old to hang out in, plus it was carpeted. The closed was cool because the door wasn’t solid, it had slats in it which allowed me to see people going by (people like my mom, dad, brother, sister or dog.) but they couldn’t see me. It was awesome, I lived in that closet. Not literally, but that’s where Barbie and I hung out- that’s where the camper parked, and that was where I went whenever I wanted some “alone time” or to escape from the family.

When I think back on it, I find it kind of ironic that I spent most of my little kid days either in a basement or in a closet. I was in a closet with a tall leggy blond- nice. I wonder about that- not so much about Barbie but more about the fact that I hung out in a closet… it’s strange, right? I loved then, as I do now, feeling as if I can see everything going on around me but also feeling fully protected. I was hidden but involved and that feeling has followed me my whole life. I want to be on the outside looking in and then either open the door or enter the room when I feel I’m ready and not a moment sooner. Sure, I popped out of that closet a lot but I mostly stayed hidden, behind the slats and safe from the world. (my family)

Anyway, I loved Barbie and I loved that damn camper. I wish I still had it.